Tag Archives: Tucker Carlson

The triumph of Hillary Clinton

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rGLQ63qUHHo]

In a hilariously titled column (“Hillary Clinton Finally Has Permission to Be a Bitch“), Lisa Miller takes stock of the outgoing Secretary of State’s performance yesterday before the Senate Foreign Relations Committee:

What Hillary thinks and says finally matters more than how she looks — which is a good thing, because in that regard, she no longer gives much of a damn. From muumuus to ponytails, her body language and her public persona over the past year or so have reminded me of what a friend once said to me about menopause: “It gives me permission to be the bitch I always was.”

The aging process is, for most of us, a cause for dread. But in Hillary’s case it is liberating: As a post-menopausal woman, she no longer needs to concern herself with the armies of attackers who for years have ceaselessly found her insufficiently girlish, womanly, or sexually desirable. (“When she comes on television,” said Tucker Carlson, “I involuntarily cross my legs.”)  She tried to please on the femininity front, she failed, and now, what the hell, she can be the ballbuster and the battle axe that her critics always said she was: smarter, tougher, and wilier than everyone else. Come 2016, Joe Biden and any other Democrat with presidential dreams should be worried.

Tucker Carlson gets the profile treatment

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aFQFB5YpDZE]

And it’s…ambivalent, to put it nicely:

The joke about mustaches and dirty words feels true because—let’s just say it—Tucker Carlson is not America’s sweetheart. The word “dick” is a frequent descriptor, often modified by “total.” That was the epithet Jon Stewart directed at him during their infamous Crossfire showdown, an encounter that hastened the demise of the program and, temporarily at least, deflated the world’s most ascendant pundit.

Search Twitter and you’ll find Carlson deemed a hack, a loser, and a bunch of other names that magazines like this one don’t publish.

He is “like that kid in the 2nd grade you just HATED,” one tweet says. The editor at large of Salon, Joan Walsh, recently asserted that Carlson is the “poster boy for spoiled rich kids everywhere.” Wonkette called him a “snide trustfunder.” The always understated Matt Taibbi once wrote in the Buffalo Beast that you “would be hard-pressed to find an American who would not leap to his feet to cheer the sight of Tucker Carlson getting his teeth kicked down an alley.” Those warm feelings extend to the Daily Caller, which Gawker—who knows a thing or two about the bottom-feeding corners of the Web—declared “the worst website on the Internet.”

And in case you need another reason to despise Tucker Carlson, there’s this: The man couldn’t be happier.

Bombing seafaring activists is OK, but try to avoid canine collateral casualties

Tucker Carlson is back in the news again. (Weird, considering he is normally completely uninvolved with real news.) This time, it’s for stating that Philadelphia Eagles QB Michael Vick “should have been executed” for the crime of killing dogs.

A bit harsh? It would seem so, although dogs have been known to inspire fierce loyalty, so Carlson cannot be completely blamed on this front.

That is, of course, except for the fact that he condoned the 1985 bombing of a Greenpeace ship.

On the other hand, like so many good right-wing firebrands these days, at least he knows how to wield the term “terrorism” like the ambiguous free-for-all word that it is (or should I say, has become). I’m assuming, of course, that Carlson is just as outraged over the twice-investigated Pittsburgh Steelers QB Ben Roethlisberger, for his alleged sexual assaults (the latter of which appears more likely to have actually taken place as described by the victim), as he is about Michael Vick and his dog-fighting.

Right?

(Incidentally, I believe this post somewhat self-deprecatingly — yet in a self-serving way — vindicates my prior post’s point about the detritus clogging so many online news and blog sites. Guilty as charged.)